Author: Reena Saxena

Proud and unbending; that is me
and see how you are soaring with my support
I had been very clear from the beginning
you don’t have to be rich to be my girl
you don’t have to be cool to rule my world
but you have to be malleable to my way of thinking
had I been an emotional cesspool like you
we both would have wallowed in nothingness
It has taken me years to mould you
to change your internal wiring
and erase your history of pliancy
I don’t care if I sound immodest
that I pulled you back from the brink
of being an average, anonymous person
if you are admired today and eulogized
it is because appearances matter
they see just the surface; tranquil and beautiful
they can’t see the turbidity beneath
let’s not go there and let’s not talk of
bruised self respect and things inconsequential

My first winter away,

Away from scorching sun and light,

I oohed and aahed,

Over a flake of snow that landed on my hands,

guarded and guarded,

Lest I lost the precious one.

My first winter away,

Away from home to be with you,

I oohed and aahed,

Over your assuring charming self,

magical and magical,

To be with you.

Yet these many winters later,

You choose to be with another,

Choosing her over me,

You see my unbending self, as a streak of arrogance,

My unbending self which was a shield over you through bright spring and summers,

My unbending self which was a reassurance through cold autumns and winters.

Yet these many winters later,

You choose to be with another,

Ignoring the times I bent to take care of you,

Ignoring the times I bent myself to stand by you,

I rue not…